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Author Archives: Corey

on my birthday

03 Sunday Mar 2013

Posted by Corey in March 2013, Self Reflection

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

bliss, celebration, creativity, family, inspiration, joy, me, self-love, slowing down, soulful, wellness

blooming

i thank You [Universe] God for most this amazing
day:for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes

(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun’s birthday; this is the birth
day of life and of love and wings: and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)

how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any–lifted from the no
of all nothing–human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?

(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)

~e.e. cummings

~~~

It is quiet now in the house. My children, both well and ill are safely sleeping. My belly is full of food lovingly raised and lovingly prepared. Soulful music floats around me. I feel oh, so content.

As I end one trip around the sun and begin another, my heart is overflowing with gratitude. I found such abundance in the year that has passed and am excited for the discoveries of this year yet to come.

There has been a shift in my heart.
There has been a shift in my soul.

I feel changed – rooted, nourished, whole. Awakened. This new-found centered-ness — this powerful stillness — has become the foundation of my creativity and of my freedom. As the trunk of a tree is grows deep within the earth, its roots reaching deep and wide and strong, as the leaves of the trees blow and turn and twist and flutter, this is as I am. I am both grounded and free, settled and wide open.

I am so grateful to have found my way to this place on my life’s journey.
I have had a long walk.

No longer moving away from the unpleasant, away from the ugly and the painful and the despairing. No. Now my branches reach for the light, looking toward the sun, embracing the spirits carried by the wind. My feet have found their home. I can feel the dirt between my toes and the strength of the planet below me. My soul has been set free. My arms are wide open, dancing in the air. My heart is open to the sky. My face soaks in the light of so much love, so much wonder.

I celebrate this birthday with my whole self.

I recognize that I will continue to experience new seasons of life. I understand that tides change and that the moon cycles. I am prepared to grow and to stretch. This tree that is me will have new limbs sprout and old dead wood that will need to be pruned. This is as it should be.

This is the gift that is my life.

happy pancakes

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friday meditation

01 Friday Mar 2013

Posted by Corey in Friday Meditation, March 2013

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

childhood, creativity, family, Friday Meditation, joy, learning, slowing down, Willow

willow weaving

A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

~ Amanda Blake Soule

~~~

thank you, my dear friends, for your patience as i continue to devote so much of my time to rooting Cedar Tree Crochet. my first large order will be complete in a few days and i am eagerly anticipating spending some quality time here in this space with you.

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busy hands ~ roller coaster ride

27 Wednesday Feb 2013

Posted by Corey in Busy Hands, February 2013

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

art, beauty, busy hands, cedar tree crochet, creativity, crochet, fear, inspiration, learning, me, yarn along

I am most myself when I am centered in a creative space. I see and feel the world differently. I am more open, more grateful, more passionate. I remain more aware of the wonder that surrounds me. Crochet is my meditation. It soothes the rough edges of my busy days. Please join me as I share the yarn I have been hooking this week.

~~~

I am so grateful to again connect with the wonderful community of knitters and crocheters Ginny gathers together with her yarn along each week.

~~~

mossy bridal necklace

This has been a roller coaster of a week for me. In one moment I am feeling triumphant and excited (like when I completed the necklace pictured above), in the next moment I am feeling frustrated and discouraged (like when I had to scrap a collar I work on for hours when my adaptation of the pattern just did not work). Sigh. I just have oh, so much work to do. Between mothering my four seemingly endlessly ill children, working full-time at the restaurant and trying to get Cedar Tree Crochet off the ground, I feel as though I hardly have time to sleep.

I am spending my days crocheting until my fingers are swollen, running around a busy restaurant and trying to maintain some semblance of order in this household of mine. I suppose these are the typical growing pains of someone who wants to work in a creative field. How stereotypical is it that I am waiting tables while I try to get my business off the ground? It’s a little funny, now that I actually think about it. I feel incredibly fortunate to be faced with the problem of too much work and not enough time, for this reassures me that my work is in demand and will find it’s niche. I am grateful that so many people have responded positively and are eager to purchase what I am making. I try to remain focused on what a blessing this all is.

I have never crocheted in this volume before and am learning exactly what the limits of my fingers are. I’m sure that eventually I will find a balance, but for now my poor fingers are hurting. My creative juices are flowing in fits and spurts as I try to both design a cohesive collection of accessories and manufacture the finished pieces. What a process of learning this has become for me. Working stitches, late nights, designer, manufacturer and accountant — I’m all in for this crazy ride. What a ride it is.

I think what I am feeling in this moment is both overwhelm and a huge fear of success, but I am determined to work through this. I will just keep going. No excuses.

This is my dream.

my baby business cards

When I reflect on my week, I do have more successes than failures. My work is coming along and I am beginning to see what my finished collection will look like. There are a lot of stitches between now and then, but knowing where I am going feels good. I also managed to carve out a little time to design and print out business cards. (I secretly love using my paper cutter.) So many people have asked for them I decided that they were a necessity. I do think they are lovely, don’t you? Oh, and can I just say what a thrilling feeling it is to have a little space on the web that is all mine? www.cedartreecrochet.com is a real place! Like with everything else right now, there is much work to be done before it is completed, but I have begun the process. As my collection grows and I gain a repertoire of designs I love I will be able to flesh out this sweet little space of mine.

I think it’s time to tackle that collar pattern again…

Oh, what a roller coaster ride, indeed.

the second piece i've made with my favorite pattern. still in need of the finishing touches, but lovely nonetheless, don't you think?

the second piece i’ve made with my favorite pattern. still in need of the finishing touches, but lovely nonetheless, don’t you think?

oh, the possibilities...

oh, the possibilities…

I feel I must also take a moment to recognize my husband for all of his love and endless support. He has heard more about crochet than any non-crocheter should have to and he has done so with so much patience and love. He has also rearranged his schedule to allow me more time to work and is steadily making progress on my studio. I’m one lucky lady to have such a partner in life. Thanks, Love.

~~~

My mind quiets and my well fills when my hands are busy creating something beautiful. If you feel moved to share what you have been creating, please leave a link in the comments below so we may revel in each other’s creative pursuits.

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friday meditation

22 Friday Feb 2013

Posted by Corey in February 2013, Friday Meditation

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

childhood, family, food, Freja, Friday Meditation, joy, reading, silliness

my blueberry girl

 

A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

~ Amanda Blake Soule

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busy hands ~ burning the midnight oil

20 Wednesday Feb 2013

Posted by Corey in Busy Hands, February 2012

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

art, beauty, bliss, busy hands, cedar tree crochet, community, creativity, crochet, fear, friends, me

I am most myself when I am centered in a creative space. I see and feel the world differently. I am more open, more grateful, more passionate. I remain more aware of the wonder that surrounds me. Reading transports me both far away and deep within. Crochet is my meditation. It soothes the rough edges of my busy days. Please join me as I share the pages I have been turning and the yarn I have been hooking this week.

~~~

I am so grateful to again connect with the wonderful community of knitters and crocheters Ginny gathers together with her yarn along each week.

~~~

love day

a little something sweet i made on valentines day

This week has been insanely busy for me in the most amazing of ways. I began my week with a trip to nearby Shepherdstown, WV to meet a couple of my best girlfriends for coffee at a groovy local shop for some gossip and to get my fix of sweet baby snuggles. I had great coffee, enthusiastic conversation, a big dose of squishy baby boy and I took a major step forward with Cedar Tree Crochet. I am proud to announce that beginning in March I will have my initial line of handmade vintage inspired accessories available at Plum, a delightful boutique that features local artisans and their work. I immediately connected with the owner, Roni when I stopped in to take a look around at her offerings and after showing her just the two bracelets I had on my wrist, she asked me to bring back a larger collection of my work for her to purchase and to sell. I think I did a happy dance on the sidewalk as soon as I stepped out of the shop.

I rode that high for a good day or two, then the reality of the situation set in. Not only did I have a marathon six day work week at the restaurant this week, I also had the additional weight of a deadline looming over me. I had a full-on panic attack Friday night. I am discovering that having my deepest, most desired dreams begin to manifest is both exhilarating and terrifying. My work is popular (I still have orders rolling in from friends both local and far away via FaceBook) and I’m making money (yay!), but now I have to put my hook where my mouth is and produce a huge volume of handmade pieces. My time is at a premium.

I have been coping with this stress by hooking my way through it. Every day before work, or, more often than not, after a long day on my feet, while the house is quiet and my babes are sound asleep, I work. I work and work and work. I am burning the midnight oil. I’m tired, but in the most satisfying of ways. I’ve heard of other people who work both tirelessly and joyfully for their goals, feeling an undeniable calling to their craft. I’m beginning to understand this pull, I think. I have never ever in my life felt like this before. I am pouring my passion into these stitches and people are responding with such humbling positivity. I am feeling both uncomfortable and gleeful, which I’m discovering is an intoxicating combination. This is new creative space for me — public and open and vulnerable and exposed. I feel myself growing in so many ways. My skills are improving in leaps and bounds and my work is beginning to take on a unique artistic voice. I am so excited and so grateful. 

Thank you for joining me on this journey.

Here is a look at some of the pieces I’ve hooked this week:

these bracelets were just a few of the pieces i've had commissioned this week. the buyer chose the color combinations.

these bracelets were just a few of the pieces i’ve had commissioned this week. the buyer chose the color combinations

the foundation of my business to date has been these fun scalloped bracelets

the foundation of my business to date has been these fun scalloped bracelets

i love the combination of punk and femininity in this wide lace cuff i made for a friend

i love the combination of punk and femininity in this wide lace cuff i made for a friend

ivory flowers

i love the boho feel of this piece. i'll always have a little hippie in me...

a boho headband, my first piece for Plum. i’ll always have a little hippie in me…

mossy lace

my most detailed work to date, this necklace is still a work in progress. made with locally hand dyed linen

my most detailed work to date, this necklace is still a work in progress. made with locally hand dyed linen

The mossy green necklace pictured above makes my creative self so proud. It was this necklace that first sparked the idea of Cedar Tree Crochet. I found an unattached image of this piece floating around online and had it saved on my phone. I looked at it longingly for months and eventually tracked down a handwritten chart for the pattern. I had no idea how to read the chart or even where to begin. This piece was my soul’s inspiration. This week I decided that it was finally time to give this beauty a try. I took it one stitch at a time and am thrilled with the result. (My heart is all aflutter… I read a chart!) I can’t wait to get to all of the finishing touches later today — I’m going to use a jewelry clasp for the first time. I am planning to try this pattern with several different yarns to see what I like best. Can you tell I’m a little bit in love? Oh, that midnight oil has been good to me.

PS – As you can imagine there hasn’t been a single page turned this week…

~~~

My mind quiets and my well fills when I am engaged with a good book or when my hands are busy creating something beautiful. If you feel moved to share what you have been reading or creating, please leave a link in the comments below so we may revel in each other’s creative pursuits.

 

 

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friday meditation

15 Friday Feb 2013

Posted by Corey in February 2013, Friday Meditation

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

art, celebration, childhood, creativity, family, holidays, Jarl

for me

 

A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

~Amanda Blake Soule

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busy hands ~ cedar tree crochet

13 Wednesday Feb 2013

Posted by Corey in Busy Hands, February 2013

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

bliss, books, busy hands, cedar tree crochet, community, creativity, crochet, inspiration, joy, learning, me, reading, yarn along

I am most myself when I am centered in a creative space. I see and feel the world differently. I am more open, more grateful, more passionate. I remain more aware of the wonder that surrounds me. Reading transports me both far away and deep within. Crochet is my meditation. It soothes the rough edges of my busy days. Please join me as I share the pages I have been turning and the yarn I have been hooking this week.

~~~

I am so grateful to again connect with the wonderful community of knitters and crocheters Ginny gathers together with her yarn along each week.

~~~

soft light

look book

this is my latest sample, a wide lacy cuff with a simple button closure. i’ve already had an order for one in a yummy milk chocolate brown

My crochet hook has been flying through yarn fast and furious this week! My seedling of a business, Cedar Tree Crochet, is keeping me mighty busy. (Do you like my new product labels?) As of yet, I still have no website and am still debating Etsy or no Etsy. This is all completely uncharted territory for me and I am purposefully taking time to meditate on these important decisions. I want to be sure that any decisions I make will move me forward in a way that feels really good and gets me excited. When this idea to work creatively first sparked in my mind, I had a vision of myself creating and nurturing personal relationships with local shop owners — driving from store to store, showing them my latest works and selling items on consignment. My intuition is telling me that it might be the right time to sink roots in creative ground with other creative spirits. These thoughts make my heart skip a beat… I am beginning to very quietly hope that I will someday be able to make my living working creatively. My heart would just about pop if I could manifest such an amazing life for myself and for my family.

Until my business plan unfolds more completely, my friends and word of mouth are keeping new orders rolling in. I am slowly trying to build up a repertoire of go-to designs that will be the foundation of my business. As quickly as each new piece finds its way to my wrist someone asks if I can make one for them. (Yay!) Eventually, I would also like to be able to fulfill special orders for occasions like weddings and christenings, but for now I am most called to lacy vintage inspired accessories. I’m loving making bracelets and am thinking that I might try a headband (maybe like this one) next. The Boho in me is stirring.

I, in a frenzy of creative energy, decided that I needed a place to collect all of my inspiration and designs right now. So I whipped up a “look book.” Inside this simple brown paper scrapbook is the essence of Cedar Tree Crochet. All of my carefully collected images that have been tucked away in an anonymous computer folder are now printed and organized so that I can go for a stroll with them, with my dear familiar friends. I am now able pause to appreciate a new detail or a new feeling stirred by something beautiful within this collection of pretty bits and pieces. I also have collected all of my resources for the designs that have been successful so far, labeled and organized all of my yarn samples and printed pictures of all of my sample items to date. I want this book to be the place I go to when I need inspiration — what I am working towards — but I equally want this book to be a place where I can go to enjoy what I have accomplished so far. Last year this time I was just learning my very first stitches! There are still oh, so many blank pages to be filled. There is so much potential in these empty spaces.

As for reading, I have actually found a little time to make progress in An Object of Beauty. (My hands can only crochet for so many hours in a day!) I’m still in love with Steve Martin and his sassy style of writing. He is the perfect combination of snark and wonder. I’m hoping to finished this book by summer… if I can find the time. Ha!

~~~

My mind quiets and my well fills when I am engaged with a good book or when my hands are busy creating something beautiful. If you feel moved to share what you have been reading or creating, please leave a link in the comments below so we may revel in each other’s creative pursuits.

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becoming a meat eater

12 Tuesday Feb 2013

Posted by Corey in February 2013, Food, Self Reflection

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

community, eating, family, food, food story, me, paleo, self-love, soulful

old things

delicious smells

raw yum

lothar and zen

I’ve struggled with eating meat. I was a vegetarian for many years and almost completely vegan for a time as well. I have always been extremely empathetic towards those things in the world that are smaller or more innocent than myself — rescuing turtles from busy streets and finding stray cats safe forever homes. Eating animals just felt wrong for a long time. I have always adored my fruits and veggies, so why eat all that flesh ripped from unknown bodies, wrapped in plastic and tossed in anonymous store coolers? I chose not to for a very long time and that decision felt right and good.

When my gluten-free journey began four years ago I eliminated wheat from my diet, but continued to rely heavily on grains — oatmeal at breakfast, quinoa salad at lunch, rice pasta at dinner. I couldn’t figure out why my weight continued to fluctuate so dramatically or why my stomach still hurt so often. Why was I bloated all the time? Why did my joints ache so much? Why couldn’t I sleep and why did my skin break out all the time? I was a busy mama of four very young children so I was just doing what I had to do to get through each exhausting day. I felt like I was already making more educated food choices than so many other people — I’d read Michael Pollan’s Omnivores Dilemma and Marion Nestle’s Food Politics — that this must just be how I had to live. I knew about good food, didn’t I? I ate organically when our budget allowed. We didn’t go out often. So, why was I still so sick?

This past year has been one of extraordinary discovery for me personally and for our family as a whole. We have gone through a great stripping away of old habits, unnecessary clutter and a complete reevaluation of what feels right and good. Beyond releasing the unnecessary tangibles, this journey has also been about releasing thoughts and behaviors that no longer serve a positive purpose in our lives. I finally decided, after examining so much internal struggle, that it was time to feel better. I finally came to the realization that I deserve to feel better. That I am worthy of health.

With the encouragement of my husband and the support of my dearest soul sister, I quietly sought out the guidance of a holistic-minded GI specialist. It took me a few unpleasant visits to cold and impersonal offices to finally find someone with whom I connected. Someone whom I could trust with my body. My doctor now is young and energetic and perfect for me. He really listens and doesn’t rush. I can exhale when he is in the room. I can share my secrets — my deep dark I-don’t-share-them-with-anyone secrets. I didn’t realize what a burden I had been carrying around until I finally shrugged it off and looked at it. Until my doctor and I examined it from the inside and the outside. Until we had talked about it and tested it. Until I finally, with deep relief, I accepted it.

My doctor has guided me through some very western medical procedures, removing  a precancerous growth from my colon and eliminated certain diagnoses. But he has also, with equal grace, guided me to a new way of eating and nourishing my body. He encouraged me to try a new way of feeding this one and only body I will ever have — this unique and amazing vessel that carries my soul on its journey. This body that is teaching me oh, so many lessons. My doctor, and that soul sister of mine, they knew what I needed.

Paleo — No grains, no dairy, no legumes, no refined sugar, very little caffeine or alcohol.

Eat like a cavewoman? Eat meat at almost every meal? No sugar? No more creamy hummus? No more steaming soy lattes from Starbucks? No more fresh crunchy corn on the cob? Gulp. It has taken me a good long while to wrap my head around such a drastic shift in my eating habits. Although my intuition had been gently guiding me in this direction for a while, I was still holding on to so much fear. I realized that I was fearful of being well. Wow. I believed that I deserved to be unwell. I believed that I deserved to suffer. Again… Wow.

No more and never again.

I believe now that I deserve to be healthy and strong and well. I deserve to have energy. I deserve to have a significant amount of our family resources devoted to me — to my belly, to my body, to my piece of mind. If I am to be a leader of young spirits. If I am to be an example and a role model to my children, they need to see me care for myself with respect and integrity. They need to see me make myself a priority. They need to see me thrive.

This is where a larger-than-life, belly laughing, lederhosen wearing German butcher named Lothar begins to walk with me on my journey. A friend of ours introduced us and we formed a fast friendship. Isn’t it so easy and so joyful when kindred spirits connect? Lothar helps me feel okay with eating meat again. More than okay, in fact, he makes me feel honored to be part of this food chain. He knows each and every farmer from whom he gathers his meat. He has visited their farms and has seen the lives these animals live — they live in open pastures and fresh straw. They eat the grasses and the forage they are meant to. They are allowed to grow naturally and unhurriedly. They are respected and cared for with loving attention. They know no fear or suffering

Every Saturday, in a new and happy family ritual, we travel a couple of towns west to the Purcellville Community Market. There, among the antiques and soaps and pickles, we find Lothar with his coolers of freshly processed meat. He makes almost any meat product you can imagine — smokey bacon, spicy sausages, savory roasts. He saves us extra pieces of our favorite speck and offers us special cuts and previously untried delicacies. (I may eat liver for the first time this spring, when, Lothar promises me, it tastes the most delicious.) I trust him, too, with my body. He respects the animals he butchers. He feeds me and my family food raised purely and cleanly and locally. Food I can feel good about eating.

So for now, and for as long as it feels right and good, I will be a meat eater. My skin is clear, my sleep is restful and rejuvenating, my belly is finally at peace and the endless bloating is gone. My weight is completely stable for the first time in my adult life. My joints are more supple. I am eating more and feeling more nourished than I ever have at any time previously in my life. My moods are more even and so are the moods of my children. We all feel better eating this way. My relationship with food feels different now — more positive, more relaxed, more joyful.

Paleo works for us.

I am a meat eater.

~~~

Have you struggled to feel worthy of good health or longed for an easier relationship with food? If you feel called to share, I encourage you to leave a comment, to tell us your story… We all have one.

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a quiet moment

09 Saturday Feb 2013

Posted by Corey in February 2013

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

bliss, family, slowing down, weekends

pretty kitty

A busy weekend is at hand. Cooking, cleaning, eating, gathering food, laughing, playing, mess making.

This was a quiet moment captured then quickly gone.

Hoping you are having a lovely weekend filled with both busy and quiet moments. The contrast —  loud and soft, active and still — makes life so much more sweet.

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(paleo) apple cinnamon muffins

08 Friday Feb 2013

Posted by Corey in February 2013, Food

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

baking, dairy free, food, gluten free, grainfree, paleo, recipe

granny smith goodness

ooey gooey yum

I posted an image of these yummy treats on Instagram and was almost immediately asked for the recipe. So, voilà! I decided to share it here with you and with my Instagram family — all who might want a little more paleo goodness in their lives. These muffins are actually a variation of my (paleo) blueberry bread and are delightfully quick and easy to whip up. Today was cold and rainy and gray so I made these this afternoon to warm up my kitchen. What smells more heavenly than the scent of warm apples and cinnamon wafting from the oven? Not much, in my opinion. Not much.

~~~

2 cups almond flour
4 large eggs
2 Tbsp raw honey
1 Tbsp all natural vanilla extract
1 Tbsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp apple cider vinegar
1 large Granny Smith apple diced and lightly sauteed (I used a bit of coconut oil)

A. Combine dry ingredients in a medium bowl and whisk thoroughly to eliminate any clumps (almond flour is very moist compared to conventional wheat flour)

B. Combine wet ingredients and mix thoroughly

C. Stir the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients mixing until combined

D. Stir in cooled apples

E. Place batter into a greased (we use coconut oil) muffin pan and bake at 350 degrees for 10-15 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean

F. Cool in the pan for about 10 minutes then gently pop then out, top with homemade coconut butter and serve!

makes about one dozen muffins

coconut make it even better

These muffins were inspired by a recipe I found here.

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With Gratitute

This space, Less & More, is where I come to process. To unravel the experiences of this life we live, to think, to wonder, to meditate. This space is safe. This space is sacred. This space is my retreat for thought and for connection.

Connection with myself and connection with you.

I’m so glad you’ve joined me. Welcome.

I encourage you to leave comments, ask questions and create community. I will respond as often as life allows and look forward to our time together.

Please feel free to link to me, but I ask that you receive permission before using any of my images.

Blessings ~ Cedar

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